Patriots for a day

 

 

Bachche Bechare (Poor kids)!

Slowly, I have learnt to ignore the constant pushing and screeching of furniture, sounds of bawling or of running, sometimes another one’s steps too who is perhaps playing with her, coming from the flat upstairs. Also the pre-teen boy cycling on the pathway where cars come and go, does not irritate  anymore.

Stuck inside the house with schools closed, longing to meet and play with friends and favourite cousins, meeting relatives and grandparents, going out for an ice cream, jumping and running around in the playground, having birthday parties, Covid-19 has put a yet unknown punctuation mark in children’s lives. Those little pleasures which comprised the ‘routine’ of their daily life are distant dreams now. The summer vacation has come and gone, but the school life has not returned to normal. What do you say when a small girl looks at you straight in the eye and asks you with such faith, “When will this Corona go? I miss my friends and my teacher.” If the virus was a mosquito or a rat, I would have smashed it to death, but don’t we all know the hidden enemies are the worst kind!

I sympathise with the parents who are themselves battling with a lifestyle restricted by insecurity and gloom over work and jobs, precautions and prevention, news of illness and death and additionally, the struggle of keeping the children healthy and busy.

(I am certain that the children of all the people reading this blog are secure at home with no abuse issues. There are no marriages or trafficking of children in these families.)

The biggest problem in being a parent is - to be a role model.  Do not lose heart. We are all in this together. So here go my gems of wisdom.

First of all, be optimistic. (The word positive has another connotation these days). We adults are anxious and worried, why pass this on the children?

Tell them it is not going to last forever. It might help if you talk to them about the blessings in their life- food, a roof over their heads, parents, friends and family, school, the right to creature comforts and do not forget to count the wi-fi connection. Why not say a prayer of gratitude together at night?

Right now, you might be scared, uncertain and no wonder, feeling unsettled. Children may also be experiencing these emotions. They are young and feel helpless. Any news of sickness or death plunges them into gloom. Be sensitive. Talk to them even if you are not very confident. You console and encourage them when they are nervous before an examination. Talk, discuss and explain what appropriate for their age, so that they are at peace.  

There is no doubt that children with siblings seem to develop social skills faster, so single-child parents be prepared. All that time and effort you saved by having only one child, spend a part of it on your darling.

The fewer people your children are exposed to, the better. But if both of you cannot be at home and you have help, make sure they have minimal exposure to other people outside your family. Lots of handwashing, no touching or hugging please!

Worried about your child gaining weight these days?  This is the best time to wean them away from fast foods. You have to serve food anyway so why not cook what they like. Unless you yourself can give a run for money to Jamie Oliver, let them explore, decide, chop, cook, bake. This is not child labour, friends, this golden opportunity of letting them know the fruits of labour, is never going to come in your life.

Is spot-walking/jumping/dancing/sit-ups possible? Join them and sweat it out at home, instead of going to the gym and being worried sick if the machine was sanitized. Focus on real games, not virtual ones. This is the time you can lay the rules. Football or badminton in the balcony or bike ride or hike, are safe if you carry a hand sanitizer. If the kids do not follow it, they just don’t go.

According to

https://www.who.int/news-room/q-a-detail/q-a-children-and-masks-related-to-covid-19

Children should not wear a mask when playing sports or doing physical activities, such as running, jumping or playing on the playground, so that it doesn’t compromise their breathing. When organizing these activities for children, it is important to encourage all other critical public health measures: maintaining at least a 1-metre distance from others, limiting the number of children playing together, providing access to hand hygiene facilities and encouraging their use. 

In general, children aged 5 years and under should not be required to wear masks. This advice is based on the safety and overall interest of the child and the capacity to appropriately use a mask with minimal assistance. There may be local requirements for children aged 5 years and under to wear masks, or specific needs in some settings, such as being physically close to someone who is ill. In these circumstances, if the child wears a mask, a parent or other guardian should be within direct line of sight to supervise the safe use of the mask.

Engage them in creative activities like drawing, painting, craft work, knitting or whatever they fancy. Giving them household chores will give them a sense of responsibility. But be sure to appreciate their efforts.

Working from home? Every half an hour get up and go to see how they are doing- their schoolwork/eating/anything else.

And yes, make dinner time family bonding time. Avoid leaving the television on in the background. 

Of course, they can FaceTime or Skype their friends. Learn all tech-secrets from them. Remember, only a few months ago, people used to brag about how their little children /grandchildren were experts in using the remotes even when they could not maneuver a spoon to the mouth.

Please, limit watching TV news. When the mainstream electronic media competing with one another in feeding tragic news gives me anxiety, how it must be affecting these impressionable minds!

Earlier, parents used to complain about children being in front of the screens all the time. Now they feel better if they are doing that. Strange times!

The schools have started their academic sessions. PCs, cell phones, tablets, laptops, video game consoles and television are the company for most children. Some parents have had to buy new phones and computers for their children’s studies during this period.

Even when the schools open, this increase in the access and adoption of digital devices would increase the longer term acceptance of these devices affecting their physical teacher-student relationship.

The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends restricting screen time to one hour per day of high quality content for children 2-5 years of age, and suggests consistent limits for children 6 years and older, but stops short of prescribing specific limits for this age group. 

Studies claim that the longer the screen time, the shorter the duration of sleep, the poorer its quality and the harder it is to fall asleep. Additionally, heavy users feel more tired during the day.

Screens produce a type of wavelength called blue light, which is what negatively affects sleep. It prevents the normal secretion of a hormone called melatonin, which is responsible for the sleep-wake cycle. Additionally, when people leave their devices on during the night, their sleep may be disrupted by notifications that produce light or sounds. 

To promote better sleep, avoid exposure to light from screens at least two hours before you go to bed and close all of your devices during the night. (https://www.jeancoutu.com/en/health/health-tips/lockdown-and-the-impact-of-screens-on-health/)

I remember how annoying it was when a lady used the mobile like a babysitter. She would hand over the phone to her daughter as soon as our women’s organization meeting began. No amount of ‘looks’ would make any difference as the girl continued to play and enjoy videos on high volume.  

At some point in our lives all of us have wondered why our parents gave us our names when we were helpless and could not protest, but a couple from Raipur who have named their twins Corona and Covid, win the trophy for this. Imagine what the children would have to go through as they grow up!

Preeti Verma with son Corona and daughter Covid born on March 27, (NDTV). Seen here with her newborns and two year old daughter.

Children are precious, so be there for them in this unusual time. Talk to your friends or talk to me. Me, who has not yet found a solution to most of my own problems, loves to distribute advice free of cost, sitting on my comfortable chair.

                                                          …