Beware of ear-cutters!
Beware of ear-cutters!
Talking of spelling errors, don’t we all agree with this young man?
Going through the comments on the earlier posts again, Hansel’s story about ‘ear cut’ stopped me in my track. Who in the name of sanity would want to spend from his own pocket and have his ear cut of his own accord? Sidetracked, I went through my own collection of spelling errors on signboards and banners and found some precious examples which I thought my readers might enjoy.
Do people actually buy crap, that too buttered or American? Three guesses for telling what this man is actually selling. Is it mosambi (sweet lime)? Then why does he advertise crap? I also checked the dictionary for both ‘catonic’ and ‘cationic’, but the meanings did not quiet answer my question.
A typically sarkari (official) list of no-nos, but what caught my eye was the spelling of alcohol. Why are the Delhi civic authorities employing Spanish painters when there are so many Indians who need jobs? Besides, if I treat this one as my own park, I might just want to do all the things mentioned in the ‘prohibited’ list.
Do tyres have walls or even egos? The red and blue combination is a tell-tale sign that it is a notice put up by the police. Which other kind of tyres are wise? Although I understand that flattery because it is insincere, could be a form of punishment for the benefactor as well as the recipient, I am flummoxed at how they ‘flatter’ an inanimate object such as a tyre.
My guess is the truck owner/driver knows what it is like for some people to have their sleep ruined due to frequent trips to the bathroom at night. Even if his suggestion is a little overboard and he prefers the non-standard spelling of night, one could take advantage of his experience and the solution he has arrived at.
India is a great democracy where everyone is treated equal, so much so that there are special places for even goats to hold meetings. What do these goats which look a little like dogs, discuss at these ‘free home delivery’ meetings?
If any of you ever meet ‘Mr Swatch Bharath’, please do ask him how many of the people who are inherently stupid and reading the notice in English understood the meaning.
Brave man this! He does not realise that most of us are s*** scared of witches. What to talk of sending them to his shop for pav bhaji, pizza and the ‘coffe’ kind of coffee, I’d faint if I ever encountered one.
I am sorry to share with you that the shop with this signboard in Indiranagar closed some time in the last couple of months. I only hope it was not due to the inventive dishes they had mentioned.
No wonder Sridevi’s death remains a
mystery because no doctor has gone on record to inform that he knows what death
by ‘drawning’ means. Has the Nobel Committee
considered the learned Director of Preventive Medicine, the only doctor on this
entire planet who knows that, for the prize in the field of medicine?
My sympathies are with the person who printed these notes and yet could not turn his dream to be the next Ambani just because some mean soul found a spelling error. No wonder the wise suggest :
In the true spirit of Love thy neighbour, I found some gems from Pakistan as well lest the people there should feel that though residents of the same sub-continent, I, in any way, consciously or as a ‘stupid person’ discriminated against them.
Most of us love dogs, and even terriers. But people of our padosi desh (neighbouring country) have finally found a big breed and declared it with a banner. Has anyone heard of this ‘terrier’?
Hats off to them for they have finally done what no country could think of- found a ‘barrier device’ for attacks and controlled their population! They have also added a word to the list of verbs in English with that. May Shakespeare’s soul rest in peace!
My heart wells up with deep sympathy for the people who have been rendered bottomless and maybe are in a serious predicament over how
to sit after the explosion of their posteriors!
The old generally counsel-do not peep
into the neighbour’s house, so I come back to my own motherland.
You have the whole weekend ahead of you. Let your imagination run wild with this announcement:
Still 😂😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 I short of fell off my chair. The spelling errors are by themselves crazzzzyyy and coupled with your outrageously humorous comments renders the writeup worthy of a standing ovation🎊🎊🎊🎊
ReplyDeleteGrate roiting, as usual.
ReplyDeleteWrite sir.
DeleteTruly marvellous piece 😀🤣😃🤣
ReplyDeleteHi Anupama mam Hats off to your keen observations. we all do come across such hoardings.,however your passion to capture and present is great.
ReplyDeleteExcellent observation by sharp eyes. Thank you very much for sharing.
ReplyDeleteAn apt ending that was ; "All's well that ends well". Many years back, my Railway Officer sent a circular warning everyone. It goes like this; " it is very erotic to see that some staff are not........" (can't remember the whole thing), but the word was supposed to be 'erratic'.Everyone read it and looked serious, i couldn't hold back my laughter; all stared; i did not disclose the code, as my Officer, was an exemplary worker, just his bad luck or the typists wanting to pack up and head home early. Not that my English is impeccable; I have made many many such errors in my life too, and I have had my share of 32 teeth gleaming at me. But this is what makes us all write and 'rong'!!!!
ReplyDeleteSimply hilarious. Where did you get all this stuff from????
ReplyDeleteThank you for the humour. We need more seriously fun stuff, in our world. Looking forward to the next.
ReplyDelete